It’s nearly noon and again, I find myself thinking. I think about quite a lot these days since my graduation from college and I find myself thinking of things that I never thought I would have to think of; loans, money, a job, my next move in life, but I find my mind trailing more towards the notion of misogyny. I ask myself again and again, ‘what is that?’ I know the definition and I’ve seen what it can do. I’ve seen the women it hurt, the opportunities lost, and the gender roles enforced upon little children on the playground and in schools. But by ‘what is that’, I mean, ‘what makes someone dislike or mistrust someone because they are female?
I’ve experienced misogyny in my life; my sister’s ex-husband who was unsatisfied that my youngest niece wasn’t a boy. I always took in things like that because even though it was never directed at me, it affected me because girls are seen as not good enough, yet, why? Why have we tricked ourselves into believing that the female sex is wrong somehow; that being a female is less than satisfactory and that men are at the top? It is always seen that men are allowed to have the final say; earn the top dollar; run the company, and leave the less than ordinary existence to the women. But why did we allow this type of thinking to manifest and continue to the point where injustice and horror is the order of the day?
I’ve listened to many discuss the reasons or the cause: that it’s religion that is at fault; patriarchal religious beliefs have fanned the fire for centuries. But since when does religion trump the recognition that women are a part of humanity and play vital roles in society; one’s religious belief shouldn’t overshadow basic intellectual reasoning. And without women, we would have no society and culture for these religions to thrive; women are an important part of life, as well as men, so why women are deemed second class, worthy only to serve men sexually, bear and raise children seems to not make any sense.
When men voice that women are trying to take power away from men, I can only think, ‘there is no power to take.’ We are all powerless in this life; powerless in our birth, our death, and whether or not anything else that happens to us. Whatever power men are screaming over of proves only their fear; fear that women will do to them what have been done to women but that is not the case, either. Yet, women do not want to reduce men into subservient roles, turning men into second class citizens that are only to be seen and not heard. Women want to be equal to men but what does mean?
Women don’t want to seen as something dispensable; a piece of body used only for sex, pleasure that’s discarded when men are bored of her. Women are not looking to be placed upon a pedestal, like a doll, with a set of dos and don’ts that hinder us in society and make us casualties to the double standard. Women want to seen as equals in the workplace, not as something that will get pregnant and leave, not before complaining of her paycheck. Women don’t want to be held up to an ideal of beauty, forever told how she must look to be considered attractive and nor do we want men to look at us as objects, possessions that they are entitled to, must have, or will punish if we do not comply.
Misogyny is a pointless idea that harms us all. The very idea of thinking that someone is superior or hateful towards someone else is resting right beside racism, homophobia, and anti-Semitism. It’s a hatred that stems from fear; misogyny, to me, is not hate but fear. The fear keeps women from being trusted or liked, regardless of what anyone says. It’s that fear that, ‘they’ll come back and get us; we must get them first.’ It’s delusional and without reason. We are a species capable of higher intelligence and reasoning; if we make glasses with an internet connection, look for life on other planets, and re-grow our vital organs, we can change our way of thinking and become the advanced species that we believe ourselves to be.